359 shopping days left ...

31 December 2012

Last day of the year again folks - just think about it; only 360 days to next Christmas ;-)))

A quick trip into town this morning cos I had to go and sort out me prescription repeat yet again.  Let's see how long it will be before they manage to cock it all up again!  Anyway, just after I got back I had a slight headache come on but it went off pretty quickly but has since come back with a vengeance.  I've taken two paracetamol and I'll see how it goes.  Hope it's not what Jan had coming on, I don't want that all!

No photo today I'm afraid, but I did find this earlier ...

An elderly couple go to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?" The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"
The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees. When the couple finish, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse."
He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them £50 and he says goodbye. A week later, the couple return and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees. This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?"
The old man says, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges £98. The Hilton charges £139. We do it here for £50, and I get £43 back from BUPA"   

Happy New Year

to you all

Dog walking, washing and a Ring of hassle

30 December 2012

Now there's a thing ... booted up me lappy and Norton started shouting at me there was a problem.  It's scanning the machine now and I hope it won't it won't be long doing so!

So it's Sunday today and Jan is having a day off church seeing as she is still feeling rough although a lot better than yesterday.  Normally she has a day off when we decided to go off birding or what not.  She's on the phone to her sister now so she must be getting a bit better ;-)))  Sad part is that it's a really nice day but I'm staying in to get some washing done and out on the line; why run the dryer when the sun's out?

Pip had her first walk outside on the roadside this morning.  She seemed to like it but was also very nervous too.  I'm sure she will be fine after a few more times.  We didn't get very far though; by the time we had walked the 100 yards to the first road junction my back and hips were hurting far too much to continue.  Hopefully that will improve as we go on too.    

I've been missing the normal news programmes over the holiday.  News 24 is good but it really doesn't give out the local news as well as the national/international news.  This morning Daft David was on saying the country is making ahead way - head way into what though?  So many people are saying that his policies are hurting the least able to deal with them, but as usual for the Tories they just don't care and won't listen to anyone unless they saying 'well done, keep at it.'  Thing is though, Labour are the same when they are in power.  As for Nutty Nick and his crowd - least said the better!  What is really needed is someone to work for the betterment of the UK without doing it through party dogma.  Unfortunately, with our current method of government then there will be no chance of that ever happening.

This afternoon we will sit and watch the final film in the Lord of the Rings.  When we first watched them we sat through Fellowship of the Ring in one sitting.  I was shattered after that.  It seemed such a long film of not stop action, fights and hiding from black riders.  I've seen them all at least once since then without feeling shattered.  Anyway, I started The Hobbit yesterday and kept laughing at it.  Jan tut-tutted but I am enjoying it again, just like the first time I read.

So let's see if I can find a photo for today.  How about this one then ... 

an old one today; it's of my mother and two of her brothers.  I think it's Nutty on the left and Richard in the middle.

And funny time ...

Two old guys suffering from Alzheimer's are sitting on a bench when an ice-cream van comes down the street. "Do you want one?" asks the first guy. "Yes, I'll have a cone, but write it down or otherwise you'll forget" says the second.
"No I won't" says the first. "Look, I want a cone with a flake, and I know you'll forget, so write it down" says the second. "I won't forget" says the first guy, getting slightly irritated.
"OK then, look - I want a cone, a flake and strawberry sauce. Now write it down or you WILL forget" says the second.
The first guy is getting quite miffed now and still argues that he won't forget. The second guy says irritably "I want a cone, a flake, strawberry sauce and hundreds and thousands sprinkled all over. You won't remember all that so WRITE IT DOWN!"
The first guy, now really annoyed, walks off and five minutes later comes back with a meat pie.  The second guy looks at him and says "Where's my chips?     

Jan's progress, New Year's Honours and the The Hobbit Begins

29 December 2012

Jan in making slow progress at the moment.  The antibiotics are working now she has a decent amount running through her system.  Hopefully she will be well enough to go to Lynda in two weeks time.  She is really looking forward to it now, especially after having had to put it off a week.

At last the BEEB has got the weather right!  Rain and gusting high winds here in Dorktown.  Good job I have no plans for going out for a few days eh ;-)))   

Last night I finished Michael Creighton's book Airframe.  I'm rather surprised with it really.  I've read a number of his books in the past and enjoyed them - until the end that is!  I've always found the endings of his books to be  weak and insipid.  The story lines all the way through them have been good and strong and moved along well.  The endings however seemed to be rushed and not very satisfying.  But Airframe was good all the way through with a clear cut ending wrapping it all up nicely.  I shall now start on The Hobbit I bought yesterday.

It's that time of year again when so called ordinary people get rewarded for doing what they do.  Major awards have been given to the two Olympics teams that did so well in London.  OK, they have done well and deserve to be recognised in some way; but Cherie Blair?  Come on ... ... ...

And good news about the 6 year old girl who has arrived back in the UK after spending three years in Pakistan when her father had abducted her and took her there.  This sort of thing happens fairly regularly you know but not so much is made of it.  Perhaps people are afraid of being called racist anti-Islamic.  And I have to be honest here and say, "Me too."  Why?  Well there's a practice within the Muslim community which is causing havoc throughout the NHS.  There are a lot of marriages between cousins within Muslim families.  That's fine and acceptable.  But when their kids go on to marry cousins too, then we begin to see the problems come about.  The family who lived next door to us in our old place had a granddaughter who is severely mentally disabled.  There is at least one more child in the family who is as badly affected as the girl.  How many more are there throughout the UK with the same issue?

Am I racist?  No.  Am I anti-Islamic?  No.  I am however concerned about just how much is this costing the NHS and local Social Services?  And all because of an issue that can be rectified for the future but the people concerned is will not accept there is a problem.  Acceptance of a problem is the first step to sorting it all out.

Do you remember Bernard Cribbins?  I do and I liked his work on telly and in films.  Anyway, he's 84 today - so happy birthday Bernard.  Also on this day, in 1170 one of our historic expressions was brought to light.  "Who will rid me of this meddlesome priest," (http://www.eyewitnesstohistory.com/becket.htm  accessed 1030hrs, 29/12/2012) muttered Henry II.  The result was four night set out and murdered Thomas a Becket in Canterbury Cathedral. 

I have no photos of Canterbury I'm afraid but I do have this ... 

the entrance to York Minster.

And a funny for today ...

So there they all where all the kids of year 6 having their first sex education lesson, the teacher puts up a diagram of the male human body up and starts to ask questions. "And can anybody tell me what this is called " asked the teacher pointing to the graphic picture.

"Its a penis miss" shouts little arthur at the front.

Next thing a hand goes up at the back of the class, "Yes Johnny can I help you?" asks the teacher.

"Err ... yea miss my dad's got two of them." says Johnny with a smirk on his face.

"How do you know that?" asked the teacher.

Coz I've seen 'em little Johnny then opens up his finger and thumb to measure out and says, "yea he's got one about this big which he uses for weeing."  Then opening up his finger and thumb he says, "And he's got one even bigger what my mum uses to clean her teeth!"

Stormy waether, shopping and new record set

28 December 2012

I'm running well late today.  The reason is that I have been recording The Lord of the Rings on telly the last few days.  After watching The Twin Towers this morning I had to get ready to go out and get some shopping done.  Jan called sent me a text 2012to say she was off to bed for a couple of hours.  That allowed me to take my time while I was out.  In fact, I stopped off at the Anchor for a couple of pints of John Smiths bitter - very nice too.  I arrived back just after Jan had got up.

So how is Jan?  Well, she is still ill but I can see a small improvement; her voice is slightly stronger although her throat is still very sore.  We're both hoping that it won't be long before we begin to see a real overall improvement.

During the 1970's I sat and read The Hobbit and really enjoyed it.  Around 15 years ago I bought it again to give it another go.  After a couple of pages I gave up thinking, "What on earth did I see in this crap!"  Well, I've just bought it again and will give it a go soon.  I've always been a bit put off Lord of the Rings by its sheer size.  As we were sorting through all the crap that Dave left we came across a boxed set of them but I did nothing with them and gave them to the PDSA charity shop.  Now of course I wish had a kept them.        

So this year according the Maily Dale has been the wettest year in England since records began.  It seems we only need another 2" of rain for it to be the wettest year for the UK since records began.  Yankydoddledandyland is also seeing massive amounts of inclement weather.  When will they decide to do something about it.  For that matter, when will the UK start to do something about?

I'm sat here looking at me A77 - and I still haven't managed to get and use it properly.  I'll be rather pleased when I can do so. It is supposed to be weather resistant but I'm not willing to give it a go just yet.  It might be OK if rains while I'm out but there is no way I am taking it out in the rain for the sake of it.  BBC News 24 weather man says the rain will continue for some days yet and winds will pick up to storm force too.  Time to stay in methinks ... ... ...

And a photo for today ...  With storms winds forecast, how about a bit of ruffers (an old sailor term for rough seas) ...

Can't remember where I got this from or which camera did the deed.        

And for a funny, how about ...

A priest in a small Irish village loved the chickens that he kept in the
coop behind the church.  One Sunday morning, before mass, he went to feed the birds and discovered that the cock was missing. He knew about the cock fights in the village, so he decided to question his parishioners in the church.
During mass, he asked his congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?"  All the men stood up.
"No, no, that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?" All the women stood up.
"No, no, that wasn't what I meant either. Has anybody seen a cock that
Doesn't belong to them?"  Half the women stood up!
"No, no, no. That wasn't what I meant. What I really mean is, has anybody
seen MY cock?"
Sixteen altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up.